Turning 29

I will be 29 years old on Sunday. Let me tell you, 28 has been overall, an utterly miserable year for me. I was laid off from my employment of nearly three and a half years. I've had nothing but difficulty dealing with state unemployment so I just gave up. I nearly exhausted my savings account just to keep myself afloat. This economic recession, which has lasted for nearly four years, has beaten down so many people that many have given up looking for work. I myself came very close to giving up a few times but I simply can't allow myself to do that. I, like many others, am going through very difficult times now. This is to be expected. I do believe that things will get worse before they get better. I am grateful that I had a savings account to keep me afloat since I've become unemployed. I am currently looking for steady employment but I seem to have found an on-call position for a company that seems to promise to be fairly busy. The major developments of this year are that another niece was born and I, rather unexpectedly, found a romantic relationship. I suppose it's true: you find love when you least expect it. I have no idea where it may lead but I enjoy any time I spend with her. Whatever happens, I am glad to have it happen. She more than redeems the failure of 2012. I admit I am dissatisfied with my life as it is, though I am working on my creative writing. Once I am earning a steady income again, I will be steadily submitting my work to magazines or small publishers for publication. I have had a bad case of writer's block for most of this year. I've been consumed with the struggle to survive. However, I recently came to the conclusion that I will leave it in God's hands. I live my life right and I can take all of this emotion that I have, positive and negative, and use it as fuel for my writing. I am a poet, essayist, occasional movie reviewer, story writer and diarist. I am grateful to be alive right now, regardless of how hard it is to survive. These are momentous and very interesting times to be alive in now and I'm glad to serve as a witness to it. I know that things will get harder as I age but I do believe that a better day is coming. I can't allow myself to believe anything else. Sometimes, I am afraid to see what else is in store for me but...I have to know what's coming next. My curiosity keeps me going...for good or ill. My curiosity, sheer stubbornness and refusal to quit keep me going. I believe that great things are still in store for me if only I am willing to work hard and keep the faith. I am willing to work hard and I have done so. I always remind myself that God doesn't place a burden on a man's shoulders, knowing that he can't carry it. He believes that this is a burden I can manage...even though sometimes...I feel He is asking too much of me. I suppose this is a way for me to measure just how much I can take and keep moving forward. I may be stronger than I give myself credit for.